Communication is key in marriage – Counsellor
Reverend Manuel Owusu-Kumi a marriage and relatiuonship counsellor has advised married couples to be mindful of their choice of words when communicating with each other.
That, he said, was important because those words have the power to either make the marriage work or mar it.
Speaking in an interview with The Spectator on Monday about some ‘dos and don’ts’ for a successful marital life, Rev Owusu-Kumi observed that marriages have two committed people determined to make the union work.
However, he said if communication was not handled well, it could ruin whatever have been achieved.
He said the use of negative words could hurt a party badly and make them withdraw temporarily or permanently in some cases, in the process affecting trust and even intimacy.
“Sometimes, after an apology and forgiveness, the offended person is not able to forget about what was said,” he noted.
Rev Owusu-Kumi said good communication should be the priority of anyone who wishes to have a long-lasting relationship devoid of conflicts.
According to the Counsellor and Therapist, it was important for persons who were already married or have plans to get married but have a challenge as regards communication to seek professional help to deal with it immediately.
Healthy marriages, he noted promotes peace of mind for couples to be productive at work, be less anxious and prevent diseases.
He said asking for assistance was not a sign of weakness as people tend to believe but rather a sign of maturity.
Rev Owusu-Kumi noted that, there were spouses that refuse to talk at home because of the fear of being misunderstood but that would overtime affect the relationship.
He cautioned against the use of derogatory expressions like ‘you are not smart,’ ‘can’t you do this simple thing,’ ‘you are useless’ or attempt to make a comparison with another person.
“In place of such expressions, couples should sound very positive, optimistic about each other and find ways of addressing their challenges together,” he advised.
The Counsellor advised couples to be calm and even excuse themselves even in the face of extreme provocation.
“This allows for reasoning, risk assessment, logic among other positive things which overtime had helped to save many marriages and even prevented physical and verbal attacks.”
He advised singles planning to get married to seek counselling from professional and certified counsellors to be advised properly.
Rev Owusu-Kumi urged the youth to consider characteristics such as a person’s vision, purpose, and determination for work in making their choices.
From Dzifa Tetteh Tay, Tema