I lost my virginity to my relative

 My father is loving, caring and his greatest desire is not only to develop the human resource base of his children, but to enable the youth in the family reach appreciable levels in education.

Irrespective of this laudable inten­tion of my father, I lost my virginity to one relative of mine when l was 14 years old.

My parents used to travel on busi­ness trips for about two weeks every three months, during which we were left under the care of our relatives who were older than us.

This elderly relative of mine be­haved as though he loved me and had my welfare at heart, not knowing be­hind his charming smiles and seeming­ly caring nature was a sinister motive to put me to bed at all cost.

Being an elderly relative who knew much about life and was sexually active, he succeeded in luring me into an active sex life.

Surprisingly, though l am now 23 years old and in the university, he still made attempts to seduce me into having an affair with him.

Since l now resist his diabolical advances, he complains vehemently about whatever l do and resorts to telling lies about me to my parents. He has been able to influence my parents to be­lieve in his part of the narrative, for which reason my parents often blame me for trying to be a naughty girl.

He has discouraged my boyfriend from visiting me with the reason that l am too young and inexperi­enced to be in a relation­ship.

I would like to report his conduct to my mother, but l am scared about my parents’ reaction when they hear of this and the likelihood that my father will withdraw the assistance he has been giving him and sack him from the house.

Kindly assist me with an answer to enable me make a decision before the worse happens.

What step should l take in order to deal with this problem?

Mercy, Odumase Krobo.

Dear Mercy,

You must know that your moral life is at stake because of the secret relationship between you and your relative.

 The fear is that the frequency of sexual acts between the two of you has the tendency of making you think that the illicit relationship is normal, while it increases your sexual appe­tite.

As a student in a tertiary institu­tion, you are no longer a child but a matured person who is capable of taking your destiny into your own hands.

This is an abominable act which must be condemned by all and failure to act now will result in consequenc­es you will grow to regret later.

This is an opportune time for you to halt this unhealthy practice before pregnancy sets in to further set the family apart.

You can imagine how enraged your parents would be when they discover this unhealthy relationship between the two of you. Be informed that you will get a fair share of the blame when they get to know.

Your relative must control his libi­do, know better and should not abuse the good intention of your father and pay him back this way.

Report his conduct to your parents before it is too late.

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