Infidelity must be condemned on both sides

Will it be accepted that, a husband should still accept it like that and take care of his wife’s children outside their matrimonial home in a case where the wife out of the blue comes to say her husband’s children are not his biological children after all?

I am asking because, some adulterous men have had their way one too many times in situations like this and the only thing that happens to the “pained wife” is for her to accept the children because they are her husband’s children regardless they are born outside their marriage. It is a bitter pill to take but part of society and some family members have a way of making this happen.

Let’s just say we are flipping the script. Sometimes we have to remind men that women too have blood running in them.

I am totally against adultery “zina”; I will never encourage any married woman to cheat on her partner no matter what. The best I can say is if she’s tired of his cheating ways, she should just opt out for her sanity but to say she should also cheat back ‘deirrr’, Allah forbid.

But I am concerned as a society that is always preaching against all forms of cheating in marriage. Don’t we think the same way we hit on women who fall short of being faithful in their marriages, should be the same way we do to the men?

But it seems and suggests that, it’s always must be the one way story. The one way is to please the men over the women no matter what. The men are always right. A married man will shamefully go out there and produce innocent children by heart with one or more women. Keep it secretly for years only for it to be known one day by his wife and relatives but the best thing you hear is, the wife must take the children based on the fact that, they are her husband’s. 

Over time, I pick up conversations with different women from different religious backgrounds, age range, different years of marriage experience and you will be surprised to hear some of the responses on what they would do if they found out their partners were having extra marital affairs/ or brought a child/ children from outside.

Some would say “they will leave the marriage.”

By Adizah Ibrahim Abu, Social Commentator

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