Why do you want to get married? – Final part

Why do you want to get married? – Final part

Couples in love cannot forget about each other

 IN this final part of the series, let us look at two other reasons some people get married. These include (stated in their own words):

11. I have to marry for financial and economic reasons

There is no denying the fact that marriage has a lot of financial and economic benefits and implications.

I am aware that many people’s decision to get married to a particular person is tied to the financial and eco­nomic stability they stand to enjoy. Indeed, through marriage, couples are able to merge their resources such as income earnings, tax filing, assets (including lands, houses, and cars) and in some cases their businesses.

However, the growing number of singles and soon-to-be couples, who are casually getting married to part­ners they barely know, only on the ba­sis of financial and economic reasons, is becoming alarming.

There are some people whose desire is to only marry a rich and wealthy person just for them to attain a certain social and economic status.

Also, there are singles who do not want to work to earn a living; therefore, they are looking for a rich partner who will cater for them as housewives or stay-home-husbands.

Depending on which country you live in, a legal marriage can come with many practical benefits. You may be tempted to marry to get a spouse visa, qualify for tax breaks, receive your spouse’s social security benefits, be able to adopt, etc. More people are marrying to get a citizenship green card or properties.

Unfortunately, many of these peo­ple see such a marriage as more of an arrangement than marriage.

Meanwhile, this kind of marriage is a legally binding contract that mostly ends up being a legal nightmare for many people. These practices are undermining the sacredness of the marriage institution itself as estab­lished by God.

Marrying someone for financial and economic reasons, without any consid­eration for other important reasons is not the way you should go.

When it comes to the qualities you should look for in a marriage partner, wealth alone should be far from being the deciding factor. Instead, look out for healthy money-related traits in your partner.

These are the traits that pertain to prudent and conscientious financial habits – having savings and investment goals, following a budget, hardwork­ing and maintaining full-time employ­ment.

12. I just love him (or her)

Yes, it is good to marry someone you love. After all, marriage is a love relationship intended to last for the rest of your lives. However, if all that is pushing you into getting married to your partner is:

“I just love him (or her)”, then that can be problematic.

“Falling in love‟ phenomenon usu­ally manifests itself in several ways. They include:

a. You cannot stop thinking about your lover.

b. You are physically, emotionally and sexually obsessed with him (or her).

c. You long to talk to him (or her) all the time, and cannot stay for per­haps six to nine hours without talking to them.

d. You daydream

e. You forget your other priorities.

f. You think your partner is so amazing that he (or she) does not have any weaknesses.

I have seen so many couples who because of ‘falling in love’ could not be separated from each other (for any reason) prior to their marriage; and yet, after getting married they have become worst enemies.

It is not enough to say you are in love; because BLIND LOVE has landed many individuals and couples into a state of severe regrets, pains and even mental illnesses.

No wonder, (on a lighter note) some have said that, falling in love ‟ is a state of temporary psychosis; it is the ‘delusion of fusion.” What do you think?

Source: Excerpts from ‘Preparing for a Happy and Fulfilling Marriage’ Book by REV. COUNSELOR PRINCE OFFEI (Psychotherapist and Marriage Therapist). Author, Psychotherapist, Psychologist, Marriage Therapist & Reverend Minister Counselor Prince& Associates Consult (CPAC)

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